Guide.. Chide..

The Age of 13 to 18. An important transition period in the adult kid's life. Mysterious physical & physiological changes. Significant pressure in studies and peer recognition. Important decisions about career. People try to find his own identity. A period in which the entire world is full of "enemies". A transition from a happy playful place to a serious, unfair and cruel world. The teenagers start understanding the world and most importantly understanding themselves.

Such an important and challenging phase of life. But does our society understands this and treats the teenagers the right way? In my opinion, it's a big NO. Especially, the parents and teachers who play a significant role in shaping the lives of teenagers.

First, the parents: Many parents still treat the teenager as a kid - they want the children to do what they think is ideal for the children - Do this, do that, don't watch that, don't play, study, don't eat that, eat this. Yes, there is good intention. But what's the use if it's counter-productive? Most parents deny the freedom the teenagers yearn for. Yes, it's like walking on a tight rope - No that easy to take sides - to be strict or liberal. Those who have taken the extremes have probably screwed the good prospects of their child. So, what can they do? First, make a very honest attempt to understand the child. One has no choice but to be a friend, as a teenager doesn't like anyone else except his/her friends. Physically and mentally try to be young. Try understanding the Gen-X culture - what they like, do, see etc. Talk their language. Listen to them. Take them around places. Treat their friends well. Yes, it's too much to ask for. But the rewards are plenty.

Second, the teachers: I feel there are 3 levels of teachers: (1)
Officers: They are just Salary-Drawers. They have absolutely no regard for the development for the students - "As long as I get my salary, it's fine" kind of mentality (2) Preachers: Teaching is an obligation and a ritual for them. They do their job reasonably well, but they stop at teaching what the text book says (3) Gurus: Best among the lot - really committed to the students - teaching is their passion and they truly are interested in the welfare of the students. They want to develop students as good all-rounded personalities. They teach, explain, listen, coach, guide and most importantly understand. I feel the current split between the 3 categories would be - 50-60% in #1, another 30-40% in #2 and a meager 10% in #3. Most people agree that that the quality of teachers and teaching has been going down a lot (esp. in semi-urban and rural areas). Even if we have 20% of teachers in #3 category, we can significantly improve the lives of teenagers. To do that, a concerted effort is required from Government, teachers and private organizations. The educational department has to develop and build people like the Infosys & Wipros of the India.

So.. before chiding and guiding the teenagers to behave in a certain way, the parents and teachers of India need to really understand the children.

Disclaimer: This post is NOT a reflection of how I was treated as a teenager. Rather, what I saw, knew, heard, read from friends and others.