Gods and Costumes

Disc. 0: This post is not entirely about concepts of God or Spirituality
Disc. 1: The song "Seval Kodi" (from the Tamil movie "Billa") is one of the inspirations for this post
Disc. 2: No intention of denigrating any God or the sentiments of the people. Just read it for fun.

There are countless concepts, theories, beliefs, realizations and assumptions about God; "Idol Worship" is predominant among them. As changes happen in every aspect, from layman's life style to rocket scientist's research methodology, they are bound to happen in the way people seek God & Spirituality. The concepts of Deepam & Aarathi[1],[2] have transformed a lot in the past – people started off with burning woods, then used oil, then camphor, then electric lamps/lights and who knows, may be in future, using some digital projectors. Similarly the way temples are built – Rajaraja Cholan[3] built the Tanjavur Brihadeeswarar temple using majestic stones; my elementary school teachers told he used elephants to carry those gigantic masses. (The biggest of all the stones at the top of the tower still amazes me a lot – without any machines or electricity, how did they manage to take them to such a height. As a kid, I used to think that they built it lengthwise on the ground and rotated it by 90 degrees, like I did in building set games). Today, the temples are built using ultra polished marbles & granite-stones, have intelligent security systems, advanced and hassle-free Q systems, with built-in entertainment, recreation, restaurants & shopping (gives you a feel of visiting a fun fair – children no longer say “no” to temples, it’s a good weekend dhamaka for them!). And the outlook of the Poojaris[4] – from a-poor-man-who-ate-nothing-but-what-was-served-to-God to today’s ultra modern man who manages all his appointments using a Blackberry and travels using different cars to different temples.

I am not at all saying the above changes are bad – I welcome the changes, esp. if it’s positive and hence this post! Yes, almost everything has changed, except may be the dressing style and costumes of Gods.

People envisaged Gods[5] as human beings and each God represented few noble qualities. I believe there are multiple reasons why this was done – (a) people have different tastes in life, as in some people like dosa[6] over rice and some others like rotis[7]. So, it’s like giving more options to people – the path doesn’t matter, end goal is what matters (b) Associating all good qualities to one God may be too much for people, which might hinder focused prayer – So, if you want to start a new business, pray to Ganapathy; if you want to study well, think of Saraswathi etc (c) More temples, more spirituality, more travel, more rituals and yeah, more holidays.

If we observe closely, the costumes of most of these Gods haven’t changed over centuries. (May be except Ganapathy, who gets interesting costumes during Vinayagar Churthi day) Some of the things that remain the same with Gods

• Many of Gods still not wearing shirts (Yes, many centuries back, people weren’t wearing shirts, but today things have changed)
• Same old Sarees, dhothis/veshtis
• Some of them still using natural dresses like tiger / deer skin, which are obsolete and illegal in today’s context
• Primitive traveling modes like using animals such as rats, peacocks, tigers etc
• Archaic weapons like rustic Vel (Spear), Thandayutham (A heavy sphere at the end of the rod – a blow using this tool would be lethal), Chakras (Wheel with sharp teeth, which is capable of traveling at Akthar’s bowling speed and cut off opponent’s intended organ)
• Using antiquated fragrance and body sprays such as natural flowers & sandal

One of the reasons of reduced levels of interests in Gods/Spirituality with the new generation youth / kids is because they find it difficult to associate themselves with Gods ;) – they don’t understand the old customs and dressing style. So, here comes some interesting ideas for changing the outlook of the Gods

• Vinayaga: He’s the god of Knowledge. The IT & gadgets geek. Always seen with the latest laptops, mobile phones, iPod and Kindle. He believes that life can be simplified by IT and technology. (There is an interesting story to tell to kids: When his dad Shiva asked him and his bro Muruga to explore the world, his bro was using a private jet and Harley Davidson to travel around the world… our intelligent Ganesha used Internet Explorer, Google and Wikipedia to explore the entire world!). He has put on some extra weight because of a typical software guy’s lifestyle, not much of exercise and spending most of the time in front of laptop. He blogs quite a bit. He’s up to to date on everything happening around the world.
• Muruga: God of Righteousness, Courage, Beauty and Romance. Wears Rayban glasses with full black dress and has a machine gun (as in Matrix movie) with 2 babes by his side in a Harley Davidson bike. His beauty, charm, cleanliness, style and personality make every gal fall for him.
• Ayyappa: God of bachelorhood. Believes that desire, lust, jealousy, greed and anger are the reasons of worry in this world. Lives in secluded places – spends most of the time in introspection, meditation and thinking about how to make the world a better place. Doesn’t mean he’s meek & feeble, his alter ego is fierce and ruthless when it comes to fighting baddies of the world.
• Shiva: God of all gods. But simple in outlook – just white pajama. Likes pet animals a lot, ranging from snakes to bulls. He’s the international arbitrator and his panchayathu always happens in the abodes of Kailaayam. People respect him a lot for everything he does.
• Vishnu: Wealthy god. Wears long gold chains with precious stones and lots of bracelets, rings etc. Silk cloth when not in office. When he goes to job, he wears fine fabric Raymond suits with Golden silky tie. It can’t be perfect than him. He’s all powerful and can be present in multiple places at the same time under different identities.
• Brahma: He’s an interesting contradiction – on one hand, he’s the most creative person, on the other hand he does the most repetitive job. He sets an example to people by saying that even if you have to do the same job again and again in life, make it interesting by being creative and different in every time you do it. He likes casual dressing – Denim jeans with half sleeve shirts, tucked in properly. Always seen wearing the cool Reebok slippers.
• Shakthi: Goddesses of Bravery, Power and a portrayal of equality of men and women. A very charming face and looking at it, everyone would get a feel of seeing their mom. She too has 2 kinds of dresses – very traditional & ultra-modern.
• Saraswathi: Goddesses of intelligence, wisdom, education and knowledge. Very professional in outlook – be it suits, or salwar kameez or sarees, she looks very sophisticated. Solves The Hindu crossword in minutes and just takes fraction of seconds to solve the “Hard” level sudoku.
• Lakshmi: Goddesses of wealth. Uses very costly costumes – from Swiss watches to Lexus cars, there is luxury in everything. She works closely with Wall Street. She’s fair, honest and confident in everything she deals with.
• Anjaneya: Great gym body with countless folds. Carries 100 Kg dumbbells in either hand. Always wears tight T-shirts showing his muscles and track pants.

Hopefully these new outlooks and dressing styles create more interest among the youth for God and spirituality. Of course, it’s just for the initial attraction – once they dwell into it more, they might just realize that spirituality & God are not external, everything is internal – May be the search begins inside.

And may be couple of centuries from now, an MMS might write a blog to change the dressing style of the Gods from what we discussed above to the style then.

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[1] These are the ways of worshipping, the most important ritual of waving lights or fragrant smoke to Gods

[2] Coincidental – both these names are my good friend's names

[3] Means King of all kings, the greatest King of Chola empire, who ruled South India long back (I’m poor in remembering dates!)

[4] The worshipper of God, who does all the rituals to God on behalf of the people

[5] Because of my limited knowledge about other religions, I am limiting to Hindu Gods/Goddesses

[6] Can be thought of as flat bread or pizza made out of rice flour

[7] Indian bread

The 4Cs: Case of "Cause-Consequence-Confusion-Cycle"

Though we frequently say "don't confuse cause and effect", many a times, it's difficult to understand whether the something is a cause or a consequence. At times each one feeds to the other to form a cycle.

A few examples

• Chicken & Egg
• Supply & Demand
• Poverty & Illiteracy
• [some people] Success & Being motivated
• [few others] Success & Failure
• [few more] Diffidence & Failure
  
• Happiness & Helping others
• Happiness & Having fun
  
• Mistakes & Frustration
• Anger & Unhappiness
• Learning & Being Passionate
• Learn & Experience (oh, that's why they call "learning experience!?")
  
• A little different: Love & Marriage
  
• In relationships: Talking & (mis)understanding
  
• Friends & Celebrations

In many cases, it's very tough to halt the cycle, once it starts (be it positive or negative) - The key is to realize how & when to break (for negative) or feed (for positive) the cycle to make it favorable for us and others.

MAdSense

Google's AdSense! A very interesting and a successful concept in deed! It, along with AdWords, contribute to nearly 99% of revenues for this $175bn MarketCap Internet-Behemoth. With Google's products becoming integral part of our life, its impact could leapfrog with the advent of rumored gPhone.

Here is an imaginative prototype of MAdSense, the next generation AdSense. This software sits in all Google applications and gPhone applications, analyzing everything that you do (e.g. email, chat, phone conversations, meetings, blogs, calender etc) - Based on the analysis (yes, only computer algorithm, Google's privacy policy doesn't allow programmers to read them - so, people can relax!), you would be given various suggestions. Some samples

• For a college student: who doesn't take bath regularly, it gives a reminder "Last bath since 12 days, 13 mins, 34 sec (and counting!)". Text Ads from gPhone would flash "Replacement for bathing: Killbuoy Deo. Effective for 720 hrs. Kills germs and even ppl standing next to you"
  
• For a guy who is in dating spree: MAdSense uses 32-Generation Artificial Intelligence programs. The MAdSense client programs are called Agents and could communicate among themselves intelligently. The MaMa module of the Agents analyze innumerable profiles of Google users and suggests dating partners based on their interests, location, availability etc. You just need to hit "I'm feeling Yucky" button - the best matching profile would be presented. A sample profile would read as "Careless, lovally, god-fearing. Free between 8 to 9 pm today. Would prefer Chicken Briyaani with double eggs. Pick-up and drop near MG Rd"
  
• For a computer nerd: Runs a program on the Distributed Agents System - DNA analysis of whether he could marry Priyanka Chopra. gPhone flashes "Simulation #1055 out of 1048576 - 0.001% complete. Current analysis suggests that Priyanka mighty be a risky proposition for you - complete mismatch of genes"
  
• For a workaholic: Flashes the message "Wife and children out of home for last 2 days. Dog wants to pee. Go home and help it"
• For a Cricket fanatic: (He watches every damn match!): (a) Mesg window1: Live Cricket match b/n "Royapuram Rockers" and "Sunnaambhu Kaalvaa Sharks" - Sharks need 5 runs from 5 balls with 5 wickets in hand to win the "Machi Vests & Briefs Weekly Cup" (b) Message window2 showing the 1983 world cup win by India (c) Mesg window 3 - India winning T20 in 2007 (d) India winning England in Lords (e) window 5 showing ESPN compere, Dhoni, explaining the rule of new format T2 (two-two) match
  
• For a movie buff: Flashes the news "Sharukh Khan just got up. His wife is getting him a Chilly tea with salt and pepper for acting very romantically with Maanavi Dixit, the daughter of the once-bollywood-queen, Madhuri Dixit"
• For a guy who watches news channels 24*7: ODTV streaming a poll - "Should Rama marry Seetha in the serial Khahani Chor Chor Kii?". Local channel, Bannerghatta TV shows a clipping with traffic jam for last 7 hours - Helicopters are being flown by Traffic police to find out the cow that has blocked the traffic.

Ok, this post might sound ridiculous for many.. but, it's not far away - Demand "are" there! Just that we need a able provider like Google or Apple or Microsoft to revolutionize this space.

PS: MAd sense => Meta AdSense

What If?

A creative prof in our not-so-creative course said that "What-If" analysis could turn out to be really interesting... Let me try out a few

1. What If "Giant Wheel" is not circular, instead elliptical?
   
2. What If kids don't learn anything new?
   
3. What If women stop shopping?
4. What If your dog doesn't bark at all?
5. What If Indian politicians speak less?
6. What If you feel sleepy during the class?
7. What If Prof feels sleepy during his class?
8. What If life expectancy becomes 400 years?
9. What If our masculine ant proposes to the beautiful elephant?
10. What If there are no computers and internet?
    

And here is one possible set of answers:

1. Law of fairness would be violated
   
2. Would turn out to be adults of today (majority!)
   
3. Men in peace. GDP(new) = 0.526*GDP(old)
   
4. You are feeding it too much. Reduce
   
5. People would do useful work.
6. Sleep!
7. Then also, you can sleep! Alternatively, you can empathize and ask him to sleep.
   
8. Our man can have a family binary tree of 20 generations with 1048575 people (2097150 ppl, if we include spouses as well) -Difficult to remember so many names! hmm.. what if everybody decides to have 8 children, the likes of earlier generations - our man would have 2305843009213693950 ppl in his family tree, before he dies (His family is ~350million times the world population estimated in July 2007!)
9. Queen Elephant IV can say "If you can take me on your back. I will"
10. I would be peacefully sleeping and you would be doing something more useful.